HeyJaredThe Borowitz Report
Home of Truth
- Indexed issues, all indexed history
- 80
- Latest indexed publication
- Nov 13, 2026
- Audience
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- Earliest indexed
- Apr 30, 2026
Latest issues
Counts describe indexed work. Gaps may reflect missing collection, not a break in publishing.
You Chose Jim Jordan’s Stupidest Quote (opens the original)
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Jordan, showing off how high he can count. (Photo: Win McNamee/Getty Images) On Tuesday, I asked TBR voters to help choose the dumbest thing that newly-christened House Minority Leader Jim Jordan has ever said. As many readers observed, it was incredibly hard to pick just one. Nevertheless, over 23,000 of you voted, and we have a winner: Read more…
It Won’t End Well for Stephen Miller (opens the original)
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As Stephen Miller descends into Donald Trump’s Führerbunker, I’m joined by Jean Guerrero, author of the viral sensation Hatemonger: Stephen Miller, Donald Trump, and the White Nationalist Agenda. Jean reveals the malignant forces that shaped the man known as Pee-Wee German. Plus: Jesse Welles’s unforgettable musical tribute to the Blue Tsunami! Read more…
Help Me Choose The Stupidest Jim Jordan Quote (opens the original)
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Jordan, showing off how high he can count. (Photo: Win McNamee/Getty Images) In a bold attempt to alienate their few remaining voters, on Tuesday congressional Republicans elected as minority leader Rep. Jim Jordan, the nation’s foremost human repellent. As a public service, I’d like to share Jordan’s stupidest quote. Unfortunately, he has been such a formidable firehose of idiocies that it’s impossible for me to choose. That’s where you come in. Please review the following Jordanisms and vote f…
Boebert Demands Votes be Recounted Manually: ‘I Favor a Hand Job’ (opens the original)
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Andrea Renault/Star Max/GC Images COLORADO (The Borowitz Report)—Having been declared a loser in her reelection bid, Rep. Lauren Boebert on Tuesday called for a manual recount of the votes, telling reporters, “I favor a hand job.” Read more…
Stephen Miller Doesn’t Want You to Read This (opens the original)
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Win McNamee/Getty Images Donald J. Trump’s epic drubbing in the midterms inspired him to replace his chief of staff, Susie Wiles, with Stephen Miller, whose popularity rivals that of explosive diarrhea. To better acquaint you with Miller (aka Pee-Wee German), here are a few things he definitely doesn’t want you to know about him. WARNING: The following is 100% factual (because I couldn’t make it up). Read more…
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