HeyJaredTouching The Fire
From feeling stuck and powerless in the aftermath of tragedy to finding your way to a new version of you with radical compassion and unapologetic clarity.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 9
- Latest publication
- Sep 29, 2026
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- Earliest in this view
- Jul 7, 2026
Latest issues
The “Access Dial” in Challenging Relationships (opens the original)
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I learned a hard but important lesson when big grief entered my life: someone’s care for you and their capacity to support you and give you what you need can be two very different things. To be fair, with hindsight I can see that this was most definitely not the first time I had been introduced to this lesson, but my needs in my relationships after loss were specific and immediate, and I had expected this specific person to meet them. And when they did not, over and over, this realization was cr
When you want to support someone grieving and don’t know how (opens the original)
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Each month I get a handful of messages that say something along the lines of, “I’m following you because my friend/ family member lost their person and I want to help, but I don’t know how”. Besides the education and “insider” perspectives that I talk a lot about, I realize I haven’t specifically put into words, in one place, where I would start with someone who’s asking this thoughtful question. I can’t speak for every griever and would never try to, and there’s so much nuance and context I can
When "sad" and "tired" and "hard" just don't touch it (opens the original)
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If you were to take a paint brush and dip it in red paint, and could only use this paint on a canvas to express what your most recent moment of anger or irritation felt like, what would it look like? Would it be a slow, careful, thin red line across the blank rectangle? Would it be hurried, thick red strokes using lots of pressure and paint and touching almost every edge? Would it be a scattering of small red dots in the corner? Those are just three of a thousand different experiences in this on
I Didn’t Trust the Water (opens the original)
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***Trigger warning: mention of drowning***When life drop kicks you out of nowhere, like when someone we love dies, or something happens that shakes your sense of safety so deeply, it makes sense that trusting life again might feel like an impossible ask. It can be hard to plan for a future when you’ve now seen just how fast and wholly the future you were sure would unfold can be taken away. It can be hard to trust that joy or ease will come back, that you’ll find yourself in this somewhere, at s
Just you and your backpack in foreign backcountry (opens the original)
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We use words like “road” and “path” when referring to going through something difficult. And I get it, we have to go “through” “it,” yes. But those words still feel to me like someone came out here first and cleared the way and marked it, and that there’s a sign at the trailhead with arrows and the number of miles until you reach the top. But that’s not what devastating loss is. I think there becomes a trail, but you can only make it as you go, and you can only see it when you stop and look behi
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