HeyJaredShaved Meats, Piled High
Blatant self-promotion for my novels because I never want to have a real job again. But, hey, it's only monthly and it's free.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 4
- Latest publication
- Sep 1, 2026
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- Earliest in this view
- Jul 7, 2026
Latest issues
Cliffs of More (opens the original)
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I finally might be getting good at vacations. It only took 40 years.Some context: I didn’t make much money in my 20s. In fact, I earned so little at the Waco Tribune-Herald that I moonlighted as a waitress until I got a salary bump to $200 a week!1 My only trips were to my parents’ (extremely modest) cottage in Fenwick Island, Delaware; various (cheap) locations in Mexico; and cities where my college roommates lived. Oh, and my college roommates a
Hate Story (opens the original)
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Have you read John Waters? You really should. I can’t pretend to be objective about him1, but he’s a divine essayist and I especially love the pieces in his first collection, Crackpot. Those include his Baltimore magazine story about the Buddy Deane Show, the inspiration for all iterations of Hairspray, but also “Puff Piece (101 Things I Love)” and “Hatchet Piece (101 Things I Hate).” It is Waters’s particular genius to construct those pieces not as lists, but day-in-the-life essays. <
“I Was Thinking of You” (opens the original)
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This is a prose version of a Bluesky thread I posted today, July 25, 2026. (The precise date matters.)A little background: Pretty much everyday, I get up, take a walk, then post on Bluesky. This practice started on Twitter, where I would write “Good morning, Baltimore,” a deliberate echo of the Hairspray song. But I left Twitter and I’m not always in Baltimore, so now it’s: Good morning, Bluesky. What follows may be a poem, a joke, a lyric, some personal info, or just the oft-repeated phrase: “B
Toy Story (opens the original)
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I’m in edits for my book, so I decided to, um, repurpose some material. I recently found this piece I wrote 27 years ago when I was a feature writer at The Sun. Technically, it’s copyrighted to The Baltimore Sun1, but I’m fond of it and decided to share it here, adding footnotes where relevant, but making no other changes. (I was dying to make other changes.) Meanwhile, don’t forget to enter the lottery to win the monthly Mystery Box, a dozen books culled from my personal shelves. Just email “La
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