HeyJaredQUEERNECKS
Queer Appalachians, Dash and Beck, sit on the porch trying to make each other laugh and swapping old stories, many of which are even true.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 6
- Latest publication
- Aug 12, 2026
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- Checking…
- Earliest in this view
- Jul 8, 2026
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Inflatable Vaginers and other queer objects (opens the original)
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Subscribe nowThis week on Queernecks, Beck and Dash prove once again that no topic is too big, too weird, or too inflatable.We start with cats, dollar-store economics, and the eternal question of whether losing one clipper guard means you should simply shave your entire head. Then Beck takes us to the opening games of the new Women’s Professional Baseball League, where history is happening even if the comment sections insist on being comment sections.From there, things go exactly where you would
The Night Dash Quit Mushrooms and Other Tales of Frivolity (opens the original)
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Subscribe nowThis week, Beck and Dash let the Wheel of What Have You send them into storytelling mode. The result is an episode about the people who become family, the stories that survive them, and the nights that probably should have ended much earlier.Beck honors her longtime friend Emily Cobb Thomas and shares a few memories that would never fit inside an obituary. Dash follows with the tale of the night he quit mushrooms forever. Along the way, they also discuss dog grooming prices, college
8 Second Holler and the Mysterious Michelle (opens the original)
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ShareThis week begins with an adult party game that should never be played with a mother-in-law and ends with Dash building a cat porch for the camper. In between, Beck and Dash invent Eight Second Holler before testing an audio-friendly version of online Pictionary. The sponsor is Scrounging, where every empty container is simply waiting for its next job. Bluegrass takes the noun slot, while one telehealth message
Jesus Christ Can't Hit a Curveball (opens the original)
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This Week’s EpisodeBefore the first pitch, Beck and Dash face the indignity of progressive lenses and an eye exam that somehow feels like a test you forgot to study for. Toledo’s smoke-filled air enters the conversation next. Cats take over soon after, followed by a frank talk about therapy. Then Five Guys gets called to the stand for charging $31 for two burgers and one fry.Eventually, the Wheel of What Have You delivers Major League, the 1989 baseball comedy that Beck has loved for years. This
Grindr's Flags are at Half Mast (opens the original)
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Subscribe nowPita went to the vet for a nail trim and decided the entire clinic needed to learn why her chart says “spicy.” A collar and muzzle later, her toes were done, the staff had seen the truth, and Beck went home with a medicine plan for next time. The medicine worked in the sense that Pita was deeply zonked. It did not stop her from barking at people, because apparently some principles survive sedation.From there, the conversation moved to Chinese food, which is where many good conversat
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