HeyJaredlynnvieira
Retired and completely unsupervised, I'm a late-blooming writer with too much time on my hands. Look for one or two comedy pieces per week, depending on how many naps I've had.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 13
- Latest publication
- Sep 27, 2026
- Audience
- Checking…
- Earliest in this view
- Jul 5, 2026
Latest issues
I Accidentally Told My Boss I Loved Him But That Wasn't The Worst Part (opens the original)
Read excerpt
The other day, as I got off the phone with my boss, Marcus, I distinctly said “Bye, love you!” before hanging up. With horror, I realized my gaff immediately, because of course I don’t love my viral, brilliant boss with the sharply chiseled chin and one quirky eyebrow that makes him appear charming yet vulnerable. Even worse, I had also agreed to host our company’s annual staff picnic, simply by saying “I’ll do whatever you want, Marcus”.I was only trying to make him take notice of me. But now I
Woman Feels Good About Decision to Only Wear Pyjamas (opens the original)
Read excerpt
When I turned 47, I decided to start wearing pyjamas outside the house. Sure, I can blame it on the bloating caused by my newly diagnosed IBS, but even still, I’ve always been drawn to oversized hoodies, caftans, and wide-legged rompers.I started out in pyjamas with no bra, but soon had to put one back on because my breasts were hanging so low that my nipples looked like holstered pistols.At first, I gave myself some simple rules:only before 9 am on weekends or holidaysonly for 30 minutes at a t
Concerns Of A Left Hand Who Doesn't Know What Her Right Hand Is Doing (opens the original)
Read excerpt
I don’t think Right Hand is attracted to me anymore. Ever since we turned 40, he’s been shutting me out. We used to spend hours each evening playing classical piano side by side, but he’s now beating sultry solos on a one-handed drum. Last night, I asked him to knit some mittens with me for the upcoming winter, but he chose to do a jigsaw puzzle instead. I could do nothing but languish on the tabletop watching him.***I’m beginning to suspect that RH may be cheating. A couple of weeks ago I notic
My Love Life Would Be Amazing If Only I Could Whistle (opens the original)
Read excerpt
All my life, I wanted to be a whistler. My dad was captain of the whistling team at school which made him a star in our local community, guaranteeing him free meals, table reservations, and a spot as grand marshal in the annual duck derby. My mom was the head cheerleader which meant they were destined to fall in love.Me? I can’t whistle at all. I purse my lips and blow, but only manage to produce a string of saliva that travels down my chin and soaks the front of my shirt.During high school, all
Husband Interrupts Wife For No Important Reason (opens the original)
Read excerpt
Hey hon, I’m home! Pickleball was great and we had twenty people show up. Are you ready to hear the details about every shot I made?I do see that you’re holding a book and your eyes are moving from left to right, but I didn’t realize you were reading. ***Hey hon, what’s the name of the place we took Nolan to that one summer? You know, the one with the park with the water fountain?Okay, okay, well how many more situps do you have to do?***Hey hon, do you mind clipping my toenails now? There
Publishing over time
Last 90 days. Choose a month to open its work.
Recurring subjects
Named in the text we hold. One piece can cover several.
Audience
No verified audience measurement yet.
About this data
Counts cover the work we have indexed. Tone needs enough text and a confident classification. Excerpts and episode notes are not full articles or transcripts.
Identity or attribution wrong? Suggest a correction.