HeyJaredLife Beyond Your Story
Learning to feel safe on the inside: one sensation, thought, word and action at a time
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 5
- Latest publication
- Sep 15, 2026
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- Earliest in this view
- Jul 7, 2026
Latest issues
Healing Happens In Community (opens the original)
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This past weekend, I went to the Literary Cleveland Inkubator Writers Conference. I’ve gone every year since the pandemic ended.This year was different. I brought my Writers Group with me.I joined that group back in 2018. At the time, we all lived in the DMV. That’s DC, Maryland, Virginia. I was in Alexandria. Gina was in Woodbridge. Brenda was in Gaithersburg.Gina and I have both left since then. She’s in Tacoma now. I’m in Cleveland. I got married in between. Gina wrote a poem and read it at m
I Got It Wrong (opens the original)
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Three months ago, I ended a post in this series with these words:“This is why regulation comes first… It requires you to be regulated enough. That is the threshold we are crossing.”I believed that when I wrote it.Last week, I found out I was wrong.Not wrong about the nervous system. Not wrong about fight, flight, and freeze, or about the rage that came out of nowhere, or about the num
This Article Starts With What No One Told Me In All My Therapy (opens the original)
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Survivors feel unsafe in their bodies. Their emotions and their thinking feel out of control. They also feel unsafe in relation to other people. The strategies of therapy must address the patient’s safety concerns in all of these domains.The first task of recovery is to establish the survivor’s safety. This task takes precedence over all others, for no other therapeutic work can possibly succeed if safety has not been adequately secured. No other therapeutic work should even be attempted until a
How to Understand What Regulation Really Feels Like in Real Life (opens the original)
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A few times in my life, I’ve felt it.Not read about it. Not learned it in a training. Felt it — in my body, for real, even if only for a few seconds.<img alt="" class="sizing-normal" height="384" src="https://substackcdn.c
Why you keep losing focus (opens the original)
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I started writing seriously about ten years ago, when I decided to write a memoir of my childhood.At first, it was easy. I lived with my Aunt Edna until I was six. Writing about that time brought back good feelings and memories I’d long forgotten. My writing happened in the morning, before the world came online. I started my days doing something that mattered to me. I went to work already feeling accomplished.Then I started writing about what it was like when I went back to live with my birth mo
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