HeyJaredHow to Glow in the Dark
Book publishing advice and community for authors of fiction and nonfiction, written by the agents at Neon Literary.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
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- Sep 25, 2026
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- Jul 16, 2026
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On prom queens, false friends, and disappointing literary agents (opens the original)
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To learn someone is to learn a new language — every time, with every new relationship. Knowing — really knowing — another person doesn’t just require using one’s words; it requires finding new meanings for them, new grammar. Until and unless you find them together, your relationship will wither in the ruins of Babel.Linguists have a term for words that sound similar in two languages but mean something different in each: false friend. For example, “actual” means “current” in Spanish and “real
It’s Ask Me Anything week! (And also, can I ask YOU some questions?) (opens the original)
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It’s been seven months since I ran my last AMA, and I think it’s high time for another one. Or rather, I think it’s high time for me to drop a useful but low-effort newsletter this week so I can catch up on client work. [jazz hands]Over the next few days, I’ll be in and out of this post as I’m able, answering whatever questions I can in as juicy and detailed a manner as circumstances allow.In the comments, please feel free to:Introduce yourselvesAsk me questions about publishing, your careers, o
Darling, *life* is an option clause (opens the original)
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[Leans across the table, sloshing my third martini]The straight answer to your question is no, you’re almost certainly not going to get the same advance for your next book — not from your current publisher, at least, and probably not from anyone.Yes, I can tell you this even though your first book hasn’t come out yet. It’s not personal; it’s just how things work. We learned from the Penguin Random House antitrust trial that the world’s largest trade book publisher loses money on around two third
How to brag without sounding obnoxious (opens the original)
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Before I start razzing you, let me be clear: I do, in fact, care to hear more about the time Joe Biden was kind to you, because I care about you. How sacred it must feel to have been taken seriously by one of history’s most powerful people. Screw the cynics! Of course you’re still in awe, and of course you want to talk about it.As an Alfred Adler devotee, I believe people live above all else for significance, that simultaneous sense of belonging and mattering. My inbox teems with testament to th
For the authors boiling in envy (opens the original)
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I have one. Every literary agent I’ve asked has one. And over the years—talking to hundreds of authors—I’ve realized that most of you have one, too. I speak of the white whale: that one competitor who’s always just sort of there, winning all the contests and compliments and cash, kinda-sorta making you want to hurl in the process. If you feel me on this, suffice to say you’re not alone.Envy is not the sole provenance of the personality-disordered lunatic. Almost all of us deal with it from time
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