HeyJaredHot Off the Pews
Often using pop culture and cinema to dissect my beliefs. While I've left the church pews behind, mormonism remains a through-line in my essays.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 12
- Latest publication
- Sep 25, 2026
- Audience
- Checking…
- Earliest in this view
- Jul 3, 2026
Latest issues
Shit I’m on About (opens the original)
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I’ve been wrestling with a starting dose of Zoloft these last two weeks. Pray to the SSRI gods for me, will ya? It’s been a battle of whether I want to soften the noise in my head or feel my clit. Toss up, really. The first week was rough but I’m hoping for the best. So, this week I thought I’d share a few dopamine hits that have made me laugh, think or feel things :) Cutie Micheal’s sweater in the opening episode of Traitors. Driving 20 minutes to see a friend for 30 minut
“Can I hold your hand?” (opens the original)
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A few years ago I went to Amy Allebest’s house to watch a table read of a sapphic pioneer screen-write. While I hadn’t suspected any queerness inside of me at the time, I should’ve known by how much I craved to hear the ending of the story of the two sister wives that there may’ve been something cooking. "Grandpa, maybe you could come over and read it again to me tomorrow.” <a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!y1s6!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_prog
Summer Camp - Aug ‘26 (opens the original)
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Saturday morning, I made my way downstairs in the lodge to see a crew already prepping breakfast. They must’ve been up by 6am. Jett, a camp counselor, had just left with a large group of hikers racing the rainy weather while the small morning crowd began to form around Lili’s coffee truck. In the thick of the morning hustle, I managed to convince a few helpers to set up tables in the main atrium in prep for our morning workshops. In this moment, I was able to make shape of the beehive forming. E
tea and crumpets, anyone? (opens the original)
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Phone in hand, I wiped my fingers all over the front, back and sides of my screen and green seafoam case. Then, without much hesitation, licked my fingers. My therapist promptly asked about my distress levels. I responded, low. My embarrassment, far more palpable in that moment. Never thought I’d pay someone to humiliate me on a Wednesday afternoon.It’s called Exposure and Response Prevention (ERP) therapy where we dive into our stressors and intrusive thoughts, whatever they may be, and try to
Monday Night at my House (opens the original)
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Monday night I sat on the porch watching the clouds change shape. It was 10:30PM and Pearl Jam’s Last Kiss was playing on my phone in the background as I choked back the last few tears of the night. We’re finally moving forward with our divorce paperwork. Nick came over after the kids went to bed to comb through the numbers. I was crying before he got there and didn’t stop until after he left. Read more
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