HeyJaredHauwa’s Newsletter
All I do is tell stories. Sometimes, they're funny, other times, not. But you'll get a story regardless.
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 9
- Latest publication
- Sep 12, 2026
- Audience
- Checking…
- Earliest in this view
- Jul 4, 2026
Latest issues
The Gist Behind Why The UK Denied My Visa.. (opens the original)
Read excerpt
For a few weeks now, it’s been the United Kingdom vs Hauwa on my social media pages.And although I know I am not going to win because, at the end of the day, I live in Nigeria, Tinubu is my president, and the Director General of NAFDAC thinks it’s funny that I may die young due to overconsumption of fake products - it’s not really about winning.It’s just pure hate.<a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!--o_!,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:st
What Is Your Genotype? (opens the original)
Read excerpt
For many Nigerians, we heard the word ‘genotype’ long before we really knew what it meant. We knew our genotype, and we knew the genotypes we were never allowed to marry - the end.Like most girls, I dreamt of my wedding day growing up. I would wrap myself in a white mosquito net, pretend it was a wedding gown and walk down the aisle to meet my husband, who was, for now, our mop stick. <a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!_ZGM!,f_auto,q_auto:g
Is Being Materialistic Such A Bad Thing? (opens the original)
Read excerpt
I was on a date with a man I met some months ago. We had been casually talking, responding to each other’s stories, and sharing reels. It was non-committal, but we finally decided to go out to dinner.I ordered lamb curry while he ordered steak. We talked about how dating in Lagos is the ghetto, carefully implying that almost everybody in the dating pool was a mess except for us. We were the exception, and it’s a miracle we found each other.Subscribe before
Nigerian Women Have Always Worked (opens the original)
Read excerpt
<img alt="" class="sizing-normal" height="900" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!O9Oi!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2F207d2d53-5967-4d3f-b042-c84e6eb8da73_565x900.webp"
Is It A Crime To Beat Up My Father-In-Law? (opens the original)
Read excerpt
“Today! Today! We are sending her back to her family!”I was kneeling in the centre of the living room. My head was bent and my eyes filled with tears falling directly onto the concrete floor. I didn’t have to look up to know that the order came from my husband’s eldest brother, Brother Gbolahan. He brought the same suggestion every time a meeting was called.“They won’t listen to us”, my husband's uncle’s voice came next.That was true. After my marriage, my parents completely refused to have any
Publishing over time
Last 90 days. Choose a month to open its work.
Recurring subjects
Named in the text we hold. One piece can cover several.
Audience
No verified audience measurement yet.
About this data
Counts cover the work we have indexed. Tone needs enough text and a confident classification. Excerpts and episode notes are not full articles or transcripts.
Identity or attribution wrong? Suggest a correction.