HeyJaredHalf Life
A bi-weekly newsletter about the stories we tell ourselves and why they matter, plus pop culture recs that stick to your ribs. 📍 Austin, TX
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 7
- Latest publication
- Sep 27, 2026
- Audience
- Checking…
- Earliest in this view
- Jul 5, 2026
Latest issues
Summer blues, living up to the hype (or not), and the case for DNFing (opens the original)
The comment I can’t stop thinking about (opens the original)
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There are a lot of objectively bad online behaviors that I can forgive. Linking to your post in someone else’s comments section is tacky, but I understand the strategy. Business owners ranting about negative Google reviews is in poor form, but the internet has long been the public arena where people process their emotions. Blatantly begging for likes or regurgitating memes as if they’re your own make my skin crawl, but after nearly 30 years online, I can turn the other cheek without a second
Unpopular book opinions, a mini theory on adulthood, and baby’s first publication (opens the original)
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Future nostalgia (opens the original)
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There’s an image of apples that haunts me, and maybe it does for you too. In the picture, there are five of them in varying degrees of complexity. On the left is a fully formed, platonic ideal: red and juicy, as if plucked fresh from the tree that morning. Going down the line to the right, each consecutive image loses distinguishing features until it’s nothing more than an outline and, eventually, a complete blank.<a class="image-link image2 is-viewable-img" href="https://substackcdn.com/image/f
Getting ahead, no matter the cost (opens the original)
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<img alt="" class="sizing-normal" height="517.3333333333334" src="https://substackcdn.com/image/fetch/$s_!Ff12!,w_1456,c_limit,f_auto,q_auto:good,fl_progressive:steep/https%3A%2F%2Fsubstack-post-media.s3.amazonaws.com%2Fpublic%2Fimages%2Fa603671b-7067-4de2-ab44-b291105127
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