HeyJaredFREQUENT CRIERS CLUB
crude attempts at staying tender when everything is scary and everyone is numb
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- 9
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- Sep 23, 2026
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- Jul 20, 2026
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shit i am wanting (and decidedly not buying) (opens the original)
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i am a taurus, ruled by venus, and so it is in my nature to lust over fine materials and goods. i am indeed cursed with fantastic taste, tax bracket and anti-consumerist sensibilities be damned. to ease the new-season-new-everything itch, i’ve listed some recent favorites to lust after together, with your company, my beloved criers.pants.unfortunately i still want a pair of thick, slutty black capris and i want to wear them with mary jane flats and little t-shirts and long lightweight jackets or
9 musts for growing a newsletter you actually like (opens the original)
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three point five years ago, i tripped and fell into a career as a freelance editor and creative advisor for substackers. i’ve worked with nearly 200 substackers from all over the world, and it is the happiest work of my life.*if you think newsletter growth is kinda cringe-y, honestly big same. i wrote this list for people like us.*(btw, i normally use this newsletter to write about kissing and crying and toenail fungus, not my day job, so i’m sorry in advance, criers, if you hate this one.)okay.
11 ideas to help you get over yourself (opens the original)
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The following list is about getting over yourself, liking yourself, and remembering who the fuck you are. Warning: this list will make you wilder; it will make you meaner; it will make your ass fatter; it will make you less governable. <img alt="" class="sizing-norma
i’m living in fantasy land now, join me (opens the original)
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Welcome to Frequent Criers Club, a series of crude attempts at staying tender when everything is scary and everyone is numb. Find a channeled message from my spirit guide (spoiler, it’s about the patriarchy), writing for attention, and my Philadelphia villain era.Follow along
I took an actually-restful vacation. AMA. (opens the original)
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I did the impossible, criers: I took an actually-restful vacation.The trick was twofold.1.) I didn’t go anywhere.Meaning, I did not travel somewhere for my vacation. After feeling like my brain was full of cobwebs and my spirit was getting a little too spooky, my only goal for my week off was to not work—to take a real shot at total rest and rejuvenation. But there was a problem, something I know all too well about myself: when left alone for too long, I get fuckin weird. My thoughts curdle, my
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