HeyJaredF*ck Around and Find Out
My take on current events, mixed with liberal political commentary, snark, and satire, because God knows there's plenty of material. I'm just throwing spitballs at those with a brain like a BB in a boxcar so join me!
- Indexed issues, last 90 days
- 27
- Latest publication
- Sep 30, 2026
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- Earliest in this view
- Aug 29, 2026
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The Gunslinger and the Senate Circle Jerk (opens the original)
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Oh, somewhere in this favored land, the sun is shining bright, the band is playing somewhere, and somewhere hearts are light; And somewhere men are laughing, and somewhere children shout, but there is no joy in Mudville—the GOP has just struck out.I’ve got a confession for you today, kittens.I might have a teeny little crush on the Gunslinger (Jack Smith). Seriously. I wish I could be as cool under fire as he, but that’s why he’s the Gunslinger and I’m… whatever I am. The Senate Judiciary Commit
Not all men. Just these men. (opens the original)
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Matthew IngallsJonathan NewellWinston LeeGillio LopesDiego SarabiaScott NorrisScott KretzschmarThese are the Cornell 7. After an alleged hours-long gang rape of a girl known as Jane Doe on the night of October 19, 2024, during which one of the defendants posted “free pussy in alum pu” and Matthew Ingalls replied “Like you can walk in and whip it out” to the Chi Phi fraternity’s Snapchat that many other young men read but did not act upon or take steps to stop the incident, during which Jane Doe
Stapled to the Resolute Desk: Deepfakes, Dandelions and the Dildo of Consequences (opens the original)
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More dispatches from the psychological thriller that is US politics. Your favorite world-early ringmaster, your Gonzo confidante, is just pulling up a camp chair, watching Trump carefully staple his dick to the Resolute Desk as the legal and electoral wolves slowly close in around him. I’m very easily entertained, which is why I report on the ever-evolving circus that is US politics and haven’t ended up in a cave somewhere, talking to rocks. Who needs reality TV when you’ve got a front row to th
A repost, per several special requests (opens the original)
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This column was originally written on August 16, 2021.F*ck Around and Find Out is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.</div
Floodwaters, “Free” Press, and Startled Chihuahuas: The Tale of an Ill-Suited Bromance. For paid subscribers. (opens the original)
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First of all, Happy Dolly Parton Day! (925)In a startling, but deeply symbolic illustration of just how far we have fallen as a country under Trump’s fascist wet dream, the American press was banned from attending the Melon Felon’s meeting with Chinese Premier Xi. But the Chinese media—who have to ask permission from twelve government ministries just to clear their throats, much less ssk Xi a question—were allowed full access with Trump noting that they were the “friendliest press corps.” Nothin
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